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Playboys, hangovers and The Queen Mum

In last week’s blog I promised you this week’s entry would be shorter. I’m not one to go back on my word. Absolutely not. As if. I said it would be much shorter and short it shall be.

Bye then,
Rosie.

Rosie as Wee Willie Winkie and brother Richard dressed as a beauty queen Pontins Jersey 1966

Mid-late ‘60s. Jersey, Channel Islands. Guess which one is me! Not the pretty one in the bikini that’s for sure. That happens to be my brother. Picture taken by Dad, professional photographer, ex-ice hockey player, yachtsman, skier, playboy. By the time this photo was taken all that rollicking was way in the past and nothing but a cold memory. Particularly the ice hockey except for one permanent reminder. My father’s shins had faint but permanent bruises on them until the day he passed away. Nice thing to remember about your dear departed dad. His psychedelic shins.

Yes, still here. Can’t get rid of me that easily.

Actually, to be honest, I’m sitting here nursing a hangover and before you start tut-tutting it’s not like that. I braved the elements this morning wrapped up in white oversized jumpers and doing a fine impersonation of a Michelin Man in the process, for two reasons. One, to flog my jewellery and two, to meet an old and dear friend I haven’t seen in ages also called Bach. I’m Bach by birth. I only added the “Holzer” on getting married as I steadfastly refused to relinquish my Bach. Since my divorce in 2001 I’ve been seriously reconsidering in reverting back to my maiden name. Indeed, some things I don’t do in a hurry.

Where does the hangover fit in?

Being sociable, as that’s what one has to be when mixing with friends, apparently, we met in a café where we, Bachy, my ex and I, caught up over a hot chocolate, a farty latte with bells on and an espresso. The latter being mine and on reflection not the wisest of choices. Two espressos later I was jumping out of my own skin. My fault entirely as I should only drink decaffeinated but I told myself it’s not every day I do this; be sociable and try to flog my jewellery.

What jewellery? If I may, I’ll divulge next time. But before I say ta-ta I have a question which has nothing at all to do with young boys impersonating young girls (he won first prize in the fancy dress contest), purple-coloured legs or desperately trying to think of something to talk about whilst trying valiantly to disguise that fact. Question: What do Britney Spears, The Queen Mother, and I have in common? Can you guess? Got it yet? No? Shall I tell you? Nothing! Absolutely nothing. But talking of The Queen Mum, if you haven’t seen “The King’s Speech” starring Colin Firth, Geoffrey Rush and Helena Bonham Carter, and you’re stuck for something to do, rent it, you won’t be disappointed.

Signing off, best to you,
Rosie
x

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Posted by on January 27, 2014 in Uncategorized

 

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Snow Go

Christmas in Carnyorth

Christmas 2000 at home in Carnyorth, Cornwall, UK. Wouldn’t you agree the ladder is a nice touch?! Put out for Father Christmas? A helping hand down the chimney? Or is it strategically placed as modern art? Seriously.

Here we are a couple of days before Christmas and the birds are singing away, chirping their little hearts out they are. I refer to the bird sound emanating from my computer and not the real thing which are noticeable by their absence. On the other hand the fridge has been totally silent with not even a whisper of a seasonal groan along the lines of “Frosty the Snowman” which would have been somewhat apt.

It is cold but not cold enough for snow but perhaps it’s waiting to unleash itself during the midst of winter. It has been known.

When your knickers are straining at the elastic following your feast of turkey or soya nut roast and your nose is as red as Rudolph’s thanks to the copious amount of alcohol you have guzzled down your gullet, you should be in the right frame of silly mind to relax and snuggle down for a laugh and a titter with “Cat Tales”. It’s free and if that doesn’t grab you the two reviews on Nook might!

Happy Christmas to one and all. Until next week.

Rx

Cat Tales by Rosemary Bach-Holzer

http://www.rosemarybachholzer.co.uk

Additional blogs and websites:
http://rbachholzer.wix.com/rbachholzer
http://rosemarybachholzer.weebly.com
http://rosemarybach-holzer.yolasite.com

Wolf Black:
http://enigmawolfblack.wordpress.com/
http://rosibaho.wix.com/wolfblack
http://wolfblackwriter.yolasite.com
http://enigmawolfblack.weebly.com

 
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Posted by on December 23, 2013 in Uncategorized

 

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More of a bleurgh than a boing.

Shingy France 2004

Shingalana, France, 2004. Either he can’t get on with the French language and he’s given up or else he’s wishing he’d purchased those sunglasses after all. That French sun can be vicious.

… continuing on from last week’s technology chat let’s include electronic goods in that, shall we? Why not indeed.

Okay! I have four computers currently using two and this is not anything grand it’s only because I buy a laptop, don’t get on with it, buy another, ditto and eventually end up by purchasing a hard disk and monitor purely so I can use my older-style keyboard which is what I should have done in the first place.

And what is this new type of keyboard anyway? No bounce to the keys whatsoever. When you hit a key it’s supposed to give a bit of a boing but not so with these new keypads you get more of a bleurgh than a boing. Plus the keys are off-centre which means when I want to write for example, “typing blogs” it comes out as “roingd vilog”. Who’s clever idea was that? Someone who either dictates a lot or uses pen and paper as no self-respecting typist would have re-arranged a perfectly good keyboard by shunting everything upon it to one side like last week’s fish.

And my point? The laptop makes noises like a chirping bird. Confuses the cat. Confuses me. It’s chirping away right now. I can hear it on the other side of the room. And that’s another thing. My fridge groans. It’s 0200 in the morning. It’s dark, I’m sleepy, just awoken and feeling the need to feed my ulcer, it’s between a yoghurt rice cake and a fruity bar when all of a sudden the fridge lets out this ghostlike groan which makes my blood gelid. I read somewhere of fridges producing noises or else they are picking up radio waves as it’s been said they sound just like Elvis Presley singing. Seriously. Rather Elvis then this withering groan. Most disconcerting.

Be well and keep warm. I will do my best to achieve this. Bye for now.

http://www.rosemarybachholzer.co.uk

Additional blogs and websites:
http://rbachholzer.wix.com/rbachholzer
http://rosemarybachholzer.weebly.com
http://rosemarybach-holzer.yolasite.com

Wolf Black:
http://enigmawolfblack.wordpress.com/
http://rosibaho.wix.com/wolfblack
http://wolfblackwriter.yolasite.com
http://enigmawolfblack.weebly.com

 
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Posted by on December 16, 2013 in Uncategorized

 

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A Charging Bull

Image

And as usual my picture has nothing to do with the week’s blog entry whatsoever although it could be depicted as on a rampage. Yes, it is I underneath the protection mask in France getting handy with a hammer. Ooh, look at all those orbs… or are they dust particles hmm… and did I ever pay for working like a brickie. My body capitulated and I was good for nothing. Serves me right.

A charging bull? That’s me as I am a Taurus and as for the charging bit, well, not so much I don’t have the energy to get mad and charge. At least not at the same time. So, why is there smoke escaping from my nostrils and not because I am inhaling on a cigarette? It’s because of technology. Again. Technology and I do not get along. I do take some of the blame when things blow up or break down but not all of it. What was I attempting to do I hear you ask? All right, let me pretend. I was attempting something really hard. I was trying to open a document. Yes! That’s it. Did it open? No. Instead I was presented with a whirry circle that looks like a plumber’s washer going round and round with a message saying “Gerrof you daft bag you have no business being here in the first place” or something along the lines of “Word not responding”.

Tell me about it.

Puts me in mind of another time of DVD players suddenly freezing and totally unresponsive to a person not a million miles away from here, repeatedly bashing the remote upon their knee and swearing at the DVD player whilst lobbying it with threats of going back to watching videos.

None of which works.

To end on a somewhat familiar note. What! So shoot me.

If this struck a chord first of all I’d love to hear from you and secondly, why not download “Musings Amusing” where real-life anecdotes and stories including my escapades with DVD players, hair dye disasters and pawnographic cats are encapsulated in this FREE eBook. Grab a coffee, definitely decaf if you have an ulcer, snuggle down and click on the link below to find a download to suit you.

http://www.rosemarybachholzer.co.uk

Additional blogs and websites:

http://rbachholzer.wix.com/rbachholzer

http://rosemarybachholzer.weebly.com

http://rosemarybach-holzer.yolasite.com

Wolf Black:

http://enigmawolfblack.wordpress.com/

http://rosibaho.wix.com/wolfblack

http://wolfblackwriter.yolasite.com

http://enigmawolfblack.weebly.com

 
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Posted by on December 9, 2013 in Uncategorized

 

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Words – coming easily?

BMW satellite

NOTHING to do with this post whatsoever but carrying on from the previous entry I stumbled upon this photo taken about 9 years ago of the car multi-tasking in France. Old BMWs do have their uses. Bless her.

Words – coming easily?

Just heard a song being played on the radio the first line of which, and incidentally is the title of the song, goes as follows: (pling) Words (pling pling pling) don’t come easy, to me… etc., etc.,.

Every writer’s worse nightmare I imagine and I can’t help but find myself cringing cowardly which has nothing to do with my drinking 100ml of fresh cabbage juice. Disgusting! Even with my commendable effort of trying to disguise the taste by mixing it with the juice of freshly-pulped apples. The bit in me that is German is not a fan of cabbage at least not in this way. My German-born father never ate sauerkraut. In fact, I do believe, like me he thought sauerkraut was a grumpy German. Anyway! Hello, my dears, and sincerely sorry I’m a day late with my own words as I had (and still do) every intention of doing a weekly blog, however, I got caught up in my latest creative adventure. I won’t say too much at this point in case it all goes pear-shaped. So, if I don’t mention it again you can draw your own conclusions and quite possibly will be spot on.

 

Until next time. Don’t forget your thermals it is freezing out. Expect snow anytime now. In fact, there’s a spot on the window, hang on, no, it’s a bird dropping… and why are these spaces so big in between my paragraphs! Oh, wonderful. Something else I have to figure out.

 

Working Website:

http://www.rosemarybachholzer.co.uk

 

 
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Posted by on November 26, 2013 in Uncategorized

 

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Link

Can you hold a wake for a car?

car RIP

I was just wondering, I mean, my old girl clocked up the miles a fair bit in England before getting me over to France and incidentally where she was to enjoy the delights of their most excellent roads. Ah yes, the roads in France are well constructed, completely empty during lunchtime (lunch is taken seriously and almost religiously) and signposted to a superior standard. How Bonnie Tyler ever got lost in France remains a mystery. She then got me over to Germany, that’s my car not Bonnie who obviously couldn’t find her way out of a paper bag, where eventually she submitted to ill-health resulting in her demise.

Only fitting I suppose, conking out in the country of her birth. She’s now sitting rather forlornly in a barely-used car park situated just outside the village. I send my ex down to check on her. And to scrape off any accumulated bird droppings. And to ensure she hasn’t any stroppy letters from the bureaucrats stuck to her windscreen along with adverts for a new massage parlour that’s just opened in town.

I’ve arranged for a friend to remove her better parts and sell them on ebay. Her remains will go for scrap. She’ll be picked like a chicken removing all the good bits until she is down to her bare bones, albeit a very big chicken.

RIP my old girl. It was good while it lasted.

If this struck a chord first of all I’d love to hear from you and secondly, why not download “Musings Amusing” where real-life anecdotes and stories including my escapades in France are encapsulated in this FREE eBook. Grab a coffee, decaf if you have an ulcer, snuggle down and click on the link below to find a download to suit you.

http://www.rosemarybachholzer.co.uk
Musings Amusing by Rosemary Bach-Holzer

 
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Posted by on November 18, 2013 in Uncategorized

 

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Books, Books, Books

Logo featuring my books

Excellent composition featuring my eBooks to date. This is available as a coaster ideal for your cup of coffee or tea which you can be drinking whilst having a break and reading my stuff.

My website can be found at http://www.rosemarybachholzer.co.uk – look forward to seeing you there!

 
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Posted by on November 11, 2013 in Uncategorized

 

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